Think about the last time you finished a big work project, or finally wrote the first chapter of a book, or taught your kids a valuable skill or lesson.
Did you feel 100% happy with your accomplishment? Or was there a nagging voice in the back of your head that no matter what you did, it somehow wasn’t good enough?
Believe it or not, there is an actual diagnosis for our inherent tendency to put ourselves down. It’s called the “Imposter Syndrome.”
This syndrome is hallmarked by a subtle but very present feeling that no matter what we just did, it wasn’t good enough, and that somehow we are inadequate.
Even if this isn’t a feeling you have all the time, it still can creep up on occasion and derail an otherwise solid path to your next goal.
After all, if you just tackled that big project, or wrote an initial chapter, it’s a lot easier to keep going if you know that the work you’ve done so far was solid.
So how do you get over the hurdle of self-depreciation? There are a few tricks and methods you can utilize to make sure your confidence stays high, and your forward path remains clear of obstacles.
There are a surprisingly large number of people who don’t know how to accept a compliment.
Whether it’s a boss, friend or a loved one, all too often we tack on an excuse in addition to a simple “thank you.”
Think of the times you accepted a compliment with a phrase like “Thank you, but it really wasn’t that much work…” or “Thank you, but it wasn’t as good as it should have been…”
Not only are you persuading yourself that your contribution wasn’t good enough, but you’re also now talking other people into it as well!
So ditch the “buts” and keep the “Thank yous.” By accepting the compliment, you’re validating your work to yourself. And the people who take notice.
Recognizing other people’s exceptional work makes it easier to identify your own.
So if you see someone doing a great job let them know!
By recognizing the details that comprise exceptional work, you’ll not only copy it, but you’ll also be able to see it in your own efforts.
If you always feel like what you do is not enough, then it’s time to question whether it’s you, or it’s your environment.
It can be as simple as a particular friend who tends to bring out the worst in you, or a job where the upper management is clueless about their employee’s contributions.
A big step isn’t always needed to address an inadequacy problem, but it’s something to consider if you’re regularly feeling out of step.
The true victors in life fail and fail again. They then have the confidence to keep on going.
Make sure you know that even if something doesn’t come out right, you have the smarts to correct it and keep going. And when something does go right, it’s all because of you.
While no one should break an arm trying to pat themselves on the back all the time, a little self-congratulations will go a long way in keeping your confidence and your goals securely on track.
How have you gained more confidence by patting yourself on the back in the past? Let us know in the comments section below!